Friendship

We all know that friendships are important. We know that we need them. We know that we cannot survive on our own. But like other things that are important we fail to take the time to cultivate and nurture lasting friendships. Proverbs 27: 10 says, “Do not forsake your friend.”
Busyness. We use the excuse of being busy to keep us from developing last friendships. When I examine my own life and think back to why I let friendships die out it was because I thought I was too busy. I didn’t take the time to nurture my friendships. I didn’t consider them important. I was willing to attempt it alone. Busyness is simply an excuse to keep people at arm’s length. But the truth is we always take time for what is important. If we choose to not take time for friendships it says that people are not important.
I believe that God puts people in our lives for a reason. There are times that we are called upon to be a friend to someone and because of fear or busyness we ignore the opportunity. Decisions determine destination.
David and Jonathan understood the value of friendships. There is every reason why these two should not be friends. Jonathan had too much at stake. It was a huge risk for him to allow his father, who hated David, to know that he loved him like a brother. Jonathan was royalty, a son of the king who would inherit the throne when his father died. David was a shepherd boy, destined to herd sheep all of his life. Because of a strange turn of events David and Jonathan come together.
After David finishes off Goliath, King Saul asks who he was. After David had finished talking with Saul, Jonathan, the kings son, comes into contact with David. Jonathan and David become friends. They make a covenant of friendship with each other. Their friendship was a constant struggle. Struggle, not because they didn’t love one another, but a struggle because Jonathan’s father, Saul, was constantly trying to kill David. Because of their friendship, Jonathan lived in constant tension.
On the one hand, God had given Jonathan a friend. A brother who he felt at one with, a brother who shared his heart. On the other hand, he had the potential to be king of Israel some day if only he played his cards right. David really had nothing to lose, but Jonathan had everything to lose. Jonathan was in a tough spot.
Jonathan knew that David would one day be king instead of him. He accepted it as reality. Jonathan was committed to the friendship. Would you help a friend get promoted, even if that meant you might not be selected for promotion? How often do we desire to be a friend like Jonathan?
I know what some of you are thinking. I don’t have any friends that are committed to me like Jonathan. If you want a friend with the depth of friendship that existed between Jonathan and David then you must be a friend. Every step away from friendships is one step toward loneliness. Every step toward friendships is one step toward a life surrounded by meaning.
We will be remembered for the relationships we did or did not develop. The decisions you make today will determine if you value your friendships tomorrow.

Priorities

I recently received my alumni magazine from Emory University. James Wagner, President of Emory University shares the need for change at Emory. The change is a result of the economic struggle that is being faced across the country. I find it interesting that change is not usually taken serious in institutions, organizations, or churches until we become financially strapped. It is during those times that if not careful we will make foolish and irreversible changes that impact the organization negatively. We are sometimes quick to move to the "how" question before we spend some time asking "what." The "how" is always governed by the "what." What has God called us to do? What is our purpose? The answer to those questions will govern how we go about accomplishing the task before us. But if we are not careful we can start making changes before we fully understand why we are making the changes. Dr. Wagner suggest some important questions every institution, organization, or church must ask as change occurs.
1. Where are we headed?
2. What is essential?
3. What do we do best today?
4. At what are we least successful, to what are we less well suited?
5. What must be strengthened?
6. What must be eliminated?
7. What opportunities for leadership do we see?
8. Is the institution, organization, church organized appropriately for what we imagine the future to be?
9. Does potential changes compromise the institution, organization, or church in its excellence (I would add also values)?

Lost Children of God

"Down near Tucson, a Pima Indian convert once asked me to go off into the desert with him, as he had something to show me. He took me into a place so wild that a man less accustomed to these things might have mistrusted and feared for his life. We descended into a terrifying canyon of black rock, and there in the depths of a cave, he showed me a golden chalice, vestments and cruets, all the paraphernalia for celebrating Mass. His ancestors had hidden these sacred objects there when the mission was sacked by Apaches, he did not know how many generations ago. The secret had been handed down in his family, and I was the first priest who had ever come to restore to God his own. To me, that is the situation in a parable. The faith, in that wild frontier, is like a buried treasure; they guard it, but they do not know how to use it to their soul's salvation. A word, a prayer, a service, is all that is needed to free these souls in bondage. I confess I am covetous of that mission. I desire to be the man who restores these lost children to God. It will be the greatest happiness of my life." Excerpt from Willa Cather's novel, Death Comes for the Archbishop.

Non-negotiable

I have been thinking about the "non-negotiable" that exist in my life. We all have them. It is the moral perimeters that exist in our life that govern our behaviors. They are defined as the values we hold essential in life. It is the moral authority that stands behind our actions. I have come up with a list for myself.

1. Worship God, not comfort.
2. Serve God, not institution.
3. Love God, not material things.
4. Surrender to God, not the world.

What value boundary markers exist in your life? What is your non-negotiable?

Honesty

I have discovered many times in the church we are more concerned with being right at the expense of being honest. Being honest means we have to be vulnerable and our culture looks down on the vulnerable as weak. We can be right without being in community (at least that is what we are led to believe) but honesty requires relationship. If you go back to Genesis you will discover that the first issue that had to be overcome was not sin but isolation. So instead of creating a community of openness and vulnerability we have created a subculture of concealing our true selves. Pastors are experts at hiding. We have the language, role, and title that can isolate and conceal us. How do we create a community that is more interested in honesty than the fact that they are getting it right all the time? How do we convince people that believing is conditioned by belonging? How do we educate our pastors by telling them that spirituality is restricted by failing to be honest and real in community? I was just thinking on that today.

Pick a Fight

I spent 30 hours this weekend with an awesome group of students. We participated in World Vision's 30 Hour of Famine (http://www.30hourfamine.org/). The goal was to raise awareness (and funds) for poverty around the world. We have been doing this for five years. This year during one of our devotion times I told the students if they were going to pick any fights this year to make sure that it was one worth getting beat up over (Not sure what parents think of that however). But seriously, think about how upset we get over superficial things and how we ignore those things in society that we should get angry about. We each need to pick our own fights and stand for justice. As we choose which battle to enter we must consider our gifts and passions. It is when we fight for God from our gifts and passions that we are fighting from our strengths and are in the best position to be used by God in His army.

Adventure Lifestyle

I get a catalog in the mail twice a year that promises "adventures of a lifetime." They really do seem adventurous - dog-sledding in the Antarctic, hiking some of the world's largest peaks, driving a jeep through the Sahara Desert. Due to the economic downturn that we are facing in America, the company is offering huge discounts on their pre-packaged adventures. That is it isn't it - we want everything "pre-packaged." This is not my personality. For our honeymoon my wife insisted on getting an all-inclusive plan. I was convinced we could make it up as we went. Depending on who you ask but I think the honeymoon was adventurous.
The reason we will pay big bucks for pre-packaged adventures is because we don't have enough time. We pay fishing guides to take us to the best spots instead of discovering them on our own. We pay for guided tours because we don't have time to learn to do anything. We hire people to take care of us. Is the goal to catch the fish? Or is the adventure in how you catch the fish?